Mark part 3 / Pierre 3ème partie

Publié le par miss link

Mark part 3

 

Mark wandered aimlessly in the streets, looking often at his watch to be sure not to miss the 10am meeting. He passed the bakery and the cafe, not feeling hungry or thirsty yet. He would have liked to stop and sit down somewhere, but wasn't sure where to do that without having to order something. He decided to stop at the library. It was very quiet at that time, right after opening. He grabbed a book randomly and sat down at a table. It happened to be a book about crusades. He read three lines, closed the book again and put it down on the table. He passed his hand on his face. What now? His stomach felt tight. He found it hard to stay quietly on a chair. It felt as if he had a whole tribe of flees jumping up and down in his belly. Anxious impatience. He stood up again, resumed his aimless walking and was back at the agency a few minutes before 10. The meeting was as boring as he expected. He caught himself looking at his watch about thirteen times within half an hour. Bored to death. What now? What was he going to do next?

He felt deeply unstable. Unsatisfied. He tried to think, but couldn't find any root cause to his anxiety. He got up in the middle of the meeting to pour himself a cup of coffee, asked if Simon wanted some. Simon shook his head and went on explaining the new legislation. Mark listened distractedly, wondering what was wrong with him. He managed to hold on until the end of the meeting, and went out of the room as soon as Simon said it was over. Simon called him back.

“Hey Mark, do you think you could tidy up the files closet? It's a huge mess. It would take you until lunch, and this afternoon you can go visit the owners.” Mark nodded and started immediately. Something to do. Good. He needed something to do.

Yet that activity didn't take enough brain space to prevent him from thinking, or from feeling incredibly nervous. He wondered if the alcohol was creating that feeling. Or the coffee. Or some deeper darker reason he hadn't managed to fish from his mind yet. He took a deep breath. And decided to go for lunch at 12:30pm.

 


 

Pierre 3ème partie


La réunion se passa plutôt bien. Pierre consigna les résultats des discussions juste après avoir raccompagné les managers à leur bureau provisoire, et vérifia ses courriels. Il en était là quand Gilles frappa. Il aimait bien Gilles. Il se retrouvait beaucoup en lui, et se rappelait avec nostalgie de sa vie quand il avait l'âge de Gilles. De plus, c'était son meilleur manager, et il était fier de ses résultats. Il lui fit signe d'entrer, et lui demanda immédiatement où en étaient ses plus gros dossiers, pensant que c'était la raison de sa visite. Mais Gilles partit sur un terrain personnel. Un terrain difficile pour Pierre. Il se reconnaissait bien trop dans son poulain.

Gilles voulait du temps. Du temps pour réparer ce que son absence et son manque d'attention, et peut-être son arrogance aussi, avaient abîmé. Pierre eut envie de lui demander s'il pensait vraiment que c'était possible de réparer des relations qu'on a négligées pendant longtemps. Mais il ne dit rien. Il l'encouragea, bien sûr Gilles prenez du temps, réparez ce que moi je n'ai pas su réparer. Ayez le succès que je n'ai pas eu, et si ça marche, donnez-moi votre recette.

Pierre dut avouer qu'il admirait la capacité de Gilles à se remettre en question. Capacité que lui-même n'avait pas eu à l'époque. Il se demanda si cela aurait changé le cours de sa vie, s'il avait pu garder un peu d'humilité et accepter ses torts. Ses yeux se remplirent d'une nostalgie qui les fit briller presque autant que des larmes. Il ravala son émotion et dit: « Mais que voulez-vous, la vie continue, et on ne peut pas se laisser abattre trop longtemps. »

Publié dans Ecriture

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